22 days has passed since i dont have work...i do become bored sometimes....but i need to enjoy this..who knows what might next job bring me to..i do pray for a job abroad..but if its in the Philippines....hopefully i can be posted abroad...
i love my family yes...but...they are a little too much for me...sometimes..i feel like regretting my decision to leave china...but then...i was like i need to move forward...i have think it over so many times...and i only regret it when i encounter some issues with money...*sighs*
i am positive i will find a new job in 2011..i am praying hard for it..and just yesterday i received a call a phone interview from one of my previous companies....i know i am thinking ahead..but i can't help it...and then yesterday i found out...you are the team leader of my friend from china...my mind have already thought a lot of things..but one thing i am really sure....i am still not yet ready to be with you or be under you...i know i prayed so hard to the Lord, to be able to forget you and just get on with my life..i am not sure why am i hesitating now...you're happy..i can say i am happy....and i really wanted to renew our friendship...i feel its not yet the right time...and when is the right time..i am not sure..i want to meet with you again...but at this point..i am vulnerable...i dont know...how can i face you...
you are an outstanding person...successful...and you shine brightly...i dont want to be blinded by it....i have my own success in the last 4 years..but compared to you....i feel inferior...you will never belittle me i know that....you're too nice to be like that....but somehow...i want to meet you again..if i am proud of myself again....i do have a stubborn pride....
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